"I miss you"

Not be like Usher or anything, but I do every now and then (more often than not if i'm being completely honest) have confessions that bring me closer to myself--to my true self.

This confession is that even though I have emotional hangups and don't always like to be as open as God's arms...and even though I seriously don't say it a lot (quite purposefully, because of what i feel and know these words to mean--i know their gravity) i really do miss a lot of people a lot. It's because I love a lot. And I like to love. Even when I'm upset with someone and don't really understand why things may not have worked out the way I wanted them to... And it's not even always a dramatic feeling. It just is what it is.

Life is so fleeting, and we're all so busy and moving here and there--I just recently realized, or determined, that I don't have the time to waste on not telling the people I love that I love them, in this way. It's a bit more subtle, but to me no less meaningful.

My "I miss you"s used to come in the "I think I might miss you" form. A huge defense in case the other person didn't share my sentiment, or even had nothing to offer on the other side of my statement. Silence is not always golden.

So if I see some value in you as a person, as a friend, or in the opportunity to hear your voice at any point, I really do miss you

Mommy (cause you're always going to be crazy and I've finally accepted that--just KIDDING--really just for putting up with me and understanding how your craziness has made me who i am :))
Daddy (for keeping the best parts of you in your life's transition and even at a distance still loving me)
Nia (even though we live in the same city)
Caira (cause you'll always be my play lil sis)
CAMILLE (I'm listening to Anthony Hamilton right now!)
Radiance (when will i see you again!?)
DeJaundre (though logic tells me not to, you caught my heart at an early age)
Earle (for your sometimes and often brutal honesty--I appreciate that in you)
REV!(for being your loving, sometimes grumpy old man self--thank you for being you)
Jon (for always listening)
Melody (for being the best not-quite-auntie ever!)
Jamar (you were something like amazing, and I'll never forget you)
Eric (for being loveable even though you weren't available--i hope one day I can accept your friendship in whatever form it comes)
Kamaria/Tiffany/Florence (I sometimes wonder if we could go back to the old days...)--the list extends and extends
Rasaan (for sticking it out)
Dave (i hope your girl doesn't mind my always and forever stance on us as friends--i only wish you happiness)
Steph Young (there's always been something real and genuine and beautiful about you that I really appreciate--thanks for keeping you in tact)

this is my confession: i miss and love you all