when it don't work

you know how people say this old piece of wisdom/advice: 

if it ain't broke, don't fix it

i get that-- i even dig it

but i feel like too often, at least I have the tendency to laissez-faire, which is to say, "let things be" that really ought not ever have been

example 1- (and tonight there will be but one...and i'll use fake names as much as i can to not burn bridges but d*%#, doesn't it sometimes feel like people want you to burn them?!?)

you volunteer/work at a place that does not pay you

volunteer=not pay

you do the work

BREAK IN TIME: as i write this post, i realize how bogus i am, but as i am a human, i still feel somehow justified

to continue: they complain no matter that they're not paying you

you may arrive late, but you get the job done 

and YOU'RE NOT GETTING PAID

and no, money isn't everything

but in an economy like this...

well anyway

the thing is, the people running the program (hypothetical, of course) are a bit delusional

they think SO highly of their program that they forget to treat people well

they ask you to do things like go get coffee--for heaven's sake, i thought this was a volunteer gig--perhaps even work exchange, but certainly not a magazine gig

anyway, at last, they threaten you to take away your volunteer post if you can't get in on time--though it will certainly inconvenience them more than you if they clear your space

the problem is--they need you more than you need them

vain thought?

absolutely, but we all know the truth

and the truth is, you've been--which is to say, I have been meaning to move on for a while, but my greedy self has been taken to the thought of "getting something for free" when the reality is NOTHING is free

when i get that through my head--no matter how long it takes--i'm always better for it

when i spend my time and my energy on things that actually matter to me

when i take the effort and put it into stuff that means something REAL to me, i'm ALWAYS better for it

always happier

always fuller

always just gooder (than a mug...and you know how good a mug is--shoutout to b. cathey)

the point, beyond my (potentially drunken) rambling is this:

fill your time with the things that will truly truly bring you joy

not the things you feel like you should do because it will look good on your resume or will make you the better self you think someone else will praise you for being

BE the best that YOU can be--in yourself without outside judgment

you will love yourself more for it

and in turn, you'll be happier

and happiness, is the purpose of living

amen.