late night muse

stuff that needs writing about
(i'm getting to it, though "getting" sounds as pitiful as trying these days)

-overworked and underprayed

-in relationships, is it more important to want your partner or to need them?

-being thankful...just because

-doing what you love, because it's a gift to love what you do

-overwhelmed by blessings

-tooting our own horns...BEEP BEEP!

-excuses really are the tools of the incompetent...or tools of incompetence (yes!)

-language used v. abused

Chicago is Dying (literally)

What is this world we have left behind?
Mother-father soil that brought us up and played us on its soil
where have all the playgrounds gone?
traffic turns deadly and gunshots twenty years old are revived all over again?

Chicago is dying underneath the weight of elevation gone bad
trains don't run no more, they stroll
slow and south
siding with imperfection

my home is stuck underneath layers of
sermons misconstrued
security measures extended
fear unmasked and mugged on a winter night

it's hot as hell and there's not much air here

(...work in progress by arinmaya)

The Problem with Doubt Is...

that it moves you no place
makes you stagnant and useless to any cause
and perpetuates itself in the eyes of all who watch you stand still on its face

Is anyone else tired of hearing this as an excuse?
My worry is there's just too many people in this country who aren't ready to elect a black president

in other news...

Since there is a world outside of US politics...
Though there is a reason it's so important to follow: because the $^*# we do to the world really does have to be curtailed, and soon.

Refugees often die before reaching Yemen because of dangerous sea conditions and overcrowded vessels. Others die at the hands of their smugglers, who order the passengers to jump overboard when the Yemeni coast guard approaches the vessel.

Is it me, or are we dealing with people PUTTING themselves on the very vessels that once carried slaves (metaphorically speaking) and dying the same deaths, soon after? Food riots are happening ALL OVER the world: Haiti, Somalia, Indonesia, Zimbabwe...
And all because (I have a limited understanding, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) farmers around the world, especially in America, have taken to planting more corn than necessary to make ethanol, which in turn rapes the soil of other nutrients that it needs to harvest other food options, hence making other foods more expensive AND scarce in other parts of the world...it's all twisted. The effects of greed and power are ENDLESS. This is one of those times that education really hurts, because it's one of those issues that's just layered and hidden, and has a simple answer but almost too many people in the way of solving this problem that's affecting too many lives that are not valued across the globe. Saddening is an understatement. If you want more/better stated info on the ethanol fuel debate, see below. Also, take seriously the electric car concept. Ideas/realities like that could keep the world afloat for maybe a little longer.

Ethanol from corn: burning money and oil

US politicians have been subsidising corn (maize) production, and its conversion to ethanol, for years. The idea is that it can be added to petrol where it both acts as fuel itself, and makes the petrol burn more efficiently and cleanly. Since it is not derived from fossil fuel it should reduce greenhouse gas emissions and help reduce American dependence on Middle Eastern oil.

Surely that’s worth the $1.4 billion annual subsidy that farmers in states like Iowa and companies like Archer Midland Daniels get every year. Greenpeace and the nuttier type of tree huggers love it.

Taxpayers may not be so keen. The full costs of the subsidy are a good deal more than the direct subsidy itself. By raising the price of corn they raise costs of food overall.

Nor does it help the environment to pay to keep about 10 million acres of land growing corn, when they might otherwise revert to nature.

The real problem with ethanol from corn is that it requires fuel to make the corn. David Pimentel a professor from Cornell has done the analysis [i]. An acre of U.S. corn can be processed into about 328 gallons of ethanol. But planting, growing and harvesting that much corn requires about 140 gallons of fossil fuels and costs $347 per acre, according to Pimentel. That is $1.05 per gallon of ethanol before the corn even moves off the farm.

The energy economics get worse at the processing plants, where the grain is crushed and fermented. As many as three distillation steps and other treatments are needed to separate the ethanol from the water. All these need energy.

Adding up the energy costs of corn production and its conversion to ethanol, 131,000 BTUs are needed to make 1 gallon of ethanol which has an energy value of only 77,000 BTU. "Put another way," Pimentel says, "about 70 percent more energy is required to produce ethanol than the energy that actually is in ethanol. Every time you make 1 gallon of ethanol, there is a net energy loss of 54,000 BTU."

Overall ethanol from corn costs about $1.74 per gallon to produce, compared with about 95 cents to produce a gallon of petrol. "That helps explain why fossil fuels -- not ethanol -- are used to produce ethanol" Pimentel says. "The growers and processors can't afford to burn ethanol to make ethanol. Drivers couldn't afford it, either, if it weren't for government subsidies to artificially lower the price."

I just ask that we all be informed, and at every turn, try to be better. Not just in personal endeavors, but in being human and making someone else's human experience better.

america's next top...democratic nominee???

as weird as this may seem, i feel like this political race is WEIRD
granted, i'm only a quarter of a century old so i've probably missed a lot where it comes to political races
but whoever loves ANTM like I do knows how you feel in the moment at the very end of the competition when there are just two girls standing there facing the judging panel
kind of wanting to clinch each others' hands, but not wanting to be tied down when it's time to start crying or jumping for joy

they just stand there, as the judges deride or congratulate them on their progress and lack thereof throughout the 14 week (?) contest
clenched teeth, hundreds of photos already taken, hungry hearts, (seldom) humble but oft humble-able spirits, passionate and driven towards a common goal...but there can only be one winner

...and then finally, one face pops up on the screen to their right
they don't automatically catch it in their periphery but the answer is right there
then finally the silence falls out and tyra announces who is America's Next Top Model
screams of jubilation--good times abound (or if you were rooting for the other girl, you just tip up that bottle of wine you were gonna celebrate with and drown the supposed hope into a "maybe next time" kind of attitude--and a winner prevails
this is not a beauty pageant
nor is it a scholarship contest with a new winner next year (though for ANTM there is always next season)
but the truth is, several lives will be changed by this very moment
the next top model will forever be changed--she is a model now (or she has a contract anyway, and a lil bit more money than she walked in with)
the judges (not quite the american public) have made a decision based on beauty and flair and a few other qualifiers that only tyra knows...and now girls (and boys) all over will either be introduced to or become more firmly settled into their ideals of beauty in america...you get the point

and i haven't even started to talk about the democratic party nomination
but to begin, it appears that we'll have to wait until the last sliver of a moment to see who's going to be the democrat's choice
we have to keep watching each episode, getting frustrated when either Barack or Hillary makes a mess in the kitchen and wants somebody else to clean it up
we are the onlookers to ridiculous arguments like who's blacker--go fig
we are theoretically silenced while the delegates or superdelegates (howard d said they're the same thing, fyi) pick and choose their candidate of choice, based on what appears to be a whim since they can't seem to vote any faster than paper absentee ballots can be counted

it just appears to me that this could go faster--lives could be better transformed (once there is a candidate, we can start rallying for people who want mccain to make a better decision)
but we're stuck in a race to see who takes the best photos while still letting their little light shine from within--or putting the other candidates' light out fast enuf not to be disqualified (though is disqualification possible? 'cause if so i have an idea...)

i guess this would be where the sponsors say,
"stay tuned"

...o' dysfunctional o'er spacious lies...

i'm tired

and you probably are too...North Carolina and Indiana are like, happening right now!
but one more word
(relevant before and after)

...by the way, like, why is it that some people don't know anything about grace and bowing out with it?
just wondering...

news just in (though known)

This (below) was one of the 200+ comments at the bottom of the link posted in my last blogpost, "Opines...." I think this respondent's words are nice and candid, short and sweet. If we're about bizness, this guy seems to know what it is. I say get 'er done. Thoughts?

Thank you for an extremely well reasoned piece. There has been so much hysteria unleashed over the Obama/Wright saga that a lucid, logical article like this one stands out like a breath of fresh air in a reeking slaughterhouse. However, without the hope and unity that Obama champions, what are we left with? Hopelessness and divisiveness. So I say to you, let's get the man elected, then we can bash him as much as we want. At least with Obama as president we'd have a chance at some kind of progress. The alternative is more of the same. Again, I really enjoyed this article and I hope it gets a lot of exposure.